‘Let us sacrifice our today so that
our children can have a better tomorrow.’
A.P.J. Abdul Kalam
To feed divinely-mandated population growth, we seek more
intensive farming on increased acreage
We must abandon this foolish carbon tax idea that threatens
an ever-fragile economic recovery
Sadly, we will not even be able to debate funding the
cleanup of our surface waters right now
The savings of the thrifty must be sacrificed to
no-strings-attached bailouts for the moneychangers
The Pygmies and the Inuit must help pay our dues,
right along with the Orangs and the Bonobos
We ask that desert species permanently accept this new
hotter, drier and windier order
Microscopic ocean life forms will simply have to adapt to
consuming our rain of plastic particulates
Migrating elephants must stop feeding upon the crops we now must
grow on their ancient pathways
We propose massive cuts to biodiversity to be offset by
large increases in human numbers
Many un-cataloged rain forest species must be replaced by new
bioengineered monocrops
To meet our taste for fish we must foster their extinction
by driving up their prices
Corporate farms will be forced to degrade the soils to meet
the nutritional needs of good families
Consumers must accept ecologically devastating imports which
don’t work, then simply break
Trees need to begin migrating to survive this absolutely
unpreventable, unproven change in climate
The frogs had best be making some kind of peace with their
inevitable and imminent extinction
We are drafting a plan to pack ever more of our people into
sprawling unmanaged ghettos
Healthcare spending must be slashed as it threatens such
truly important items as defense
We must enforce the tacit global agreement to collectively
bury our heads in the sand
Please grant your old jobs to foreigners and believe that
the better ones come to you tomorrow
We ask that polar bears and musk oxen take Personal
Responsibility for their adaptation
Nearly all of us must accept a uniformly low living standard
in the name of globalization
It is not without some regret that we unveil our new energy
independence through coal initiative
During these times of real crisis, noise and light pollution
are simply not on our agenda
We must secretly violate your privacy to prevent more awful
attacks we cannot mention
We ask mothers to carry PCBs, metals and hormones in their
milk for the sake of our progress
Our people must bravely sacrifice their children’s futures
to fulfill their own implanted desires
The songbirds shall be called upon to disappear from their
shredded habitats everywhere
Our rivers will have to carry the burden of our billion
points of unconscious toxic runoff
The last old growth forests will be asked to provide us with
a few bad, but temporary logging jobs
Sales reps of all one true gods must demand blinder faith
for empty promises of eternal salvation
Bankers will be asked to endure symbolic wrist-slappings as
they grasp at more unaudited handouts
Oil companies must accept record profits on a declining
supply yet subvert all energy alternatives
For the sake of leaving not one child behind, we seek a
general dumbing down of all of society
We petition coal extractors to patriotically hold down costs
thru non-remediated strip-mining
Regrettably, as His chosen people we must pursue a cowboy
exceptionist foreign policy, in His name
In this time of shared sacrifice we ask for a continued
suspension of our collective common sense
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